It's about time!

So, it's been. . .  oh, several months, I guess. I know you've all been missing me like crazy. The lack of my sparkling wit and stunning personality have left you all devastated, I'm sure. So, after the long silence, here's an update.

On the writing front, there's nothing new to report. I've read a lot. And I mean a lot. And, in a strange way, I'm learning a lot about writing from all the reading I've been doing. Wake, Fade, Liar, and more. It's been good. I haven't really written much of anything at all. My laptop died about two months ago and we only just replaced it. (Fortunately, there was a back up of all my files.) Between the computer and being sick, my motivation to put fingers to keyboard has been pretty close to nil.

I've discovered a few things, though. I really am a writer. Even when I don't have the ability to write, the ideas don't stop. I have things to work on for years to come. It's pretty great. Also, I'm far too critical of myself. I spent a while feeling really bad about not being really active with my writing. I have to remind myself that two years ago, I didn't even know I could write a book and now I have two finished first drafts with edits and real potential. Even if I have to take an extended hiatus, I know I'm capable of the work and that is a huge thing to discover about myself.

So, this has brought me to a few conclusions. First, since I'm capable of doing it, it won't really matter if I take an extended break from writing. My kids have to be my first priority, especially since they are all so young. And time consuming. Second, even if I'm not actively writing, I can still be improving my craft. I can have a writing journal for new ideas. I can read books to see what works and what doesn't. There's lots of ways to keep my hand in, so to speak.

I still want to stick around in the blogosphere, so I'm working on a few things in the back of my head. Maybe a weekly post about what I've learned from the books I read or some other such thing.

Now, for some really exciting news. We found out we're having a girl. It's pretty great after two little boys. She'll be the  most rough and tumble girl, ever, based on her brothers. She'll have to be just to survive. We're halfway through pregnancy at this point and things are starting to settle down. I feel a lot more stable and less sick. It's great.

We're also in the process of buying a house. We've been renting for years and years, so putting down roots is a little scary. We've never been ones to do major life events one at a time, though, so it's all good. I like staying on my toes. (At least I tell myself that. It helps with the insanity.)

So, there you have it. That's me in the last several months. Hopefully, there won't be such a long gap before my next post. Have a great week, everyone and we'll see you all again soon!

Just stopping In

Well, as I suspected, pregnancy has been pretty rough. I spend a lot of time on the couch, ignoring the feeling in my stomach. Or at least trying to. Pregnancy has a sort of selective amnesia associated with it, I think. I never remember until I'm in the middle of it just how sick I get. I get a shot every two or three days, take an anti-nausea pill every day, and can't cook at all. It's a lot of fun. And next time I start to think "Oo... a baby might be fun" I'll have to remember the first four months of pregnancy.

I haven't worked on anything at all in more than two weeks. I haven't even opened a word document. I just can't focus on anything. It makes me a little sad, actually. I was really in the groove and pushing forward. Now, I have no idea what kind of time line to attach to anything. I just don't know what to expect.

I miss all of you. That's one of the most surprising things. I wanted to stop into the blogosphere today and catch up a little, since it's a relatively better day, and I miss you! I hope that you are all doing well, that your journeys are fulfilling, your work is rewarding, and your days are enjoyable. I'll stop in again on a good day and see what you are all up to.

PS. I have a few awards that I've received and I haven't forgotten about them. I'll get to them when I can.

Thanks

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone for their comments and support. It's a really exciting and strange time for me right now and I'm glad to have the blogging buddies that I do. You each have blessed my life. I wish I could take the time to thank you all individually, but really, that would take a long time.

Watch for occasional updates from me. Maybe in a month or so when morning sickness starts to slow down and energy starts to come back, I'll have more time to say something. Love you all. Have a great weekend.

Change

Well, life is strange sometimes. I hadn't anticipated this moment coming so soon, but it has. It's been an eventful couple of weeks... okay. Several months, really. And it's all taking it's toll on me right now. We found out a few weeks ago that we're pregnant. We're expecting our third baby sometime in December. It's pretty monumental and life altering and just ... I don't know how to describe it.

Pregnancy hits me pretty hard, at least at first. Morning sick and I are friends all day long. And with a three year old and an 18 month old, it's pretty exhausting. I've tried to keep up with writing and blogging and all the stuff that comes with it, but I just don't have the energy to devote to it right now.  It makes me kind of sad, but I've decided to take a break for a while. I'll still fit in writing time when I can, but I really don't have any idea how often that will be. I don't want to put any unrealistic expectations on myself. I want to cherish this time with my kids and getting ready for a new one.

It's funny. I'm sitting here crying about it, but I'm really happy. It's exciting. I just never expected to have such mixed emotions about taking a break. Blame it on the hormones, I guess. So, I'll see you when I see you. Stop by every once in a while. I'm sure that I won't be able to just back out completely. And I will be coming back as soon as I feel more balanced and energized.

Thanks, every one, for being part of my life. I hope you stick around. I like you!

And one more thing

Today is the last day of Small and Simple Things Week. I've really had a good time focusing on the small things that I can do to be better and the simple things that make it worthwhile. I hope you have too.

I have just one more thing I wanted to add. Thank you. Thank you to all of you who come and read this blog. Thank you for the comments. Thank you for connecting with me in this journey. Thank you for the support and encouragement on my down days and the celebrations on the good ones.

I can't think of anything more important than telling you all that I really appreciate you and the friendships we have made. Have a great weekend. I know I will.

A few Simple Things

It's "Small and Simple Things Week", Day Four. Today's entry is all about the simple things that make writing and reading worthwhile.

 I saw this quote and knew it was perfect. "Richer than me you'll never be, for I have a mother who reads to me." I love reading to my sons. I love that my 3 year old picks up the books on his own and tells himself the story. (Very inventively, most of the time.) And now, the 18 month old does the same thing.

I love that feeling of finding just the right words to express what I've been thinking. Whether it's in a blog post or in my manuscript, I love to make words sing. I love the satisfaction of a solid string of feeling on the page.

I love being able to share a piece of myself through the things that I write. And in return, I love being able to know more about someone else by reading their words. I love the connection that forms as we exchange these little portions of being.

I love curling up with a good book and knowing that someone put so much effort into providing me with a new and meaningful experience. I have a freedom and excitement for life when I read something that really resonates with me.

I love that I am doing something every day that I really enjoy. I love to feel like I'm able to express myself, to be creative. It feels like I'm doing something that will last forever.

There's a few of my simple things. What are some of yours?

A Few Small Things

It's Small and Simple Things Week, Day Three. Welcome to you. Come on in and take a seat. Jeeves will be along shortly with a beverage.

Once a week, my husband and I sit down and talk. We discuss our calendar for the coming week, what our personal goals are, things that we want to work on.  We talk about the progress of our little family. The things the boys have learned. Things that made us laugh. Things that frustrated us. Things we'd like to see change based on the previous week. It's a really unique opportunity to connect over the mundane things that we otherwise take for granted.

This week, my big goal is to work. I know. It's kind of strange to set that as a goal, but I feel like I've been slacking off. I thought hard about what the small things are that I need to do to feel productive and successful. And it really just comes down to work. Work at keeping the house clean. Work at getting critiques done for my crit group. Work on writing new stuff. Work at spending quality time with my kids. It all really seems to come back to working.

Another small thing I'm working on this week is being more positive. I admit it. I've been kind of down on myself. It's a cyclical thing. It's hard to want to do anything at all when I'm feeling low. Motivation reaches critical mass and implodes into some sort of black hole. And this is going to take more work. Small thing. Big difference.

The last thing small thing is to set really (and I mean really) attainable, measurable, realistic goals. Get the dishes done. Pick up the living room. Write 300 words. Read one chapter. Things that I can reward myself for. It's an important thing.

What are your small things? What are you focusing on right now?