Monday, June 27, 2011

Lovin the language blogfest

Jolene Perry at Been Writing is hosting the Lovin' the Language Blogfest today. She has some great news hidden in her post, so you should check it out. You can still sign up on the linky list at her blog, but your time is limited, so after you have read my post, go! Fight! Win! Okay. Not fight so much, but you get the idea.


HERE ARE THE RULES:

Pick any five lines or any five SHORT exerpts from one of your WIPs. If you're feeling shy, and don't want to share from your own work, share from something you LOVE.

I'm going to share a little bit from The Last Musician, which is the idea I started working on, but had to shelve for lack of time. By which I mean, I hadn't put in enough time to build the story. It's still growing in the back of my mind and will be the next project when I finish editing Sleep.

This snippet is from the very beginning of the story. The MC has met an old homeless guy in a rain storm and now is talking to his mom. It reminds me a lot of the conversations I had with my mom when I was irritated at the world.

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He took a big bite out of the sandwich to placate her and left the rest sitting on the plate in front of him. “I ran into a homeless guy on the street just as it started to rain or I would have been home a little earlier.”

“Oh, I see. And how did that make you feel?” she asked, intently staring at him.

“Wet, Mom. I felt wet. I need to go change my clothes, okay?”

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I love it because it feels so real to me. I was a bit of a sarcastic back-talker sometimes and the voice makes me feel something. I hope you enjoyed it!

And, friends, while you are here, sign up for my blogfest taking place on Wednesday. It's the "Why I Write" blogfest and you can get to it by clicking on this link or by clicking on the button in the sidebar. I'd love to have you join in!

21 comments:

ajkulig said...

I randomly decided to sign up for this blogfest today. ^^

Is your mom a shrink? That is what I picture when I read "And how did that make you feel?" LOL

Jolene Perry said...

That made me laugh out loud! THANKS!

Chantele Sedgwick said...

Ha ha! Hilarious!! :D

Shannon said...

Love the exchange!

Angie said...

I like that. Very real conversation. I can totally see myself as the "how did that make you feel?" mom. =)

Krispy said...

I love it. The attitude and conversation definitely ring true, and I just love the snark in his reply. Haha. Thanks for sharing!

Gracie said...

That's an awesome snippet, and a perfect reply. :) Thanks for sharing!

Jo Bryant said...

great - so much attitude.

Shallee said...

I love it! I get a sense not only of character, but of the relationship between the kid and the mother. Great job in just a few words.

Summer Ross said...

That's amusing "wet mom" LOL

Dawn M. Hamsher said...

LOL...I felt wet! I liked the humor!

The Write Soil

Lucy Adams said...

I see myself in that annoying mother character. You captured her perfectly in that one line and her son's reaction.

Lucy

Vicki Rocho said...

That is soooo something I would say!

Trisha said...

Hehe, yeah I love sarcasm - it kind of runs in my family. LOL. Great excerpt!

Sarah Nicolas said...

It sounds like he has a strong voice! Nice.

Danyelle said...

Definitely feels very real. :) I love the character's voice!

Kaylee Baldwin said...

This made me laugh! I love a snarky teen. :)

Carol said...

Spoken like a true teenager. This was great!

Small Town Shelly Brown said...

LOL! So funny! I love well written dialogue that is fresh and biting. Brilliantly done, my friend.

Ruth said...

Great dialog! Thanks for sharing!

ali said...

I do love the voice. Great job Kayeleen!