Monday, May 23, 2011

More Me

I find myself in a strange position. As more people find and follow the blog, I find myself wanting to be more profound. More meaningful. More insightful. More... you know. Something. It didn't seem to matter what I said before because no one was "listening" to what I had to say. But now, there are so many of you. And a lot of you are people that I interact with in several different mediums. Like Twitter. And the pressure to be starts to feel a little more... pressing. Okay. Not that insightful or meaningful. Just something that is.

It really emphasizes to me that I have to be more me. I mean, if I actually met you, I would want you to have a pretty good idea of who I was and what I was like. You all hang out and read what I have to say because it me talking. Not someone else. And not me trying to be something I'm not.

We're at my in-laws for the day. Just a short day trip, really. We decided to drive the two hours on a whim last night. My brother-in-law and one of hubby's cousins are also writers. The brother-in-law was published by a small press two years ago. I married into a creative family. We were talking about writing and having writing blogs and all the things that go with it. And I realized again that I am my own brand of writer. My way of doing things and my take on what's going on around me is unique. And that's what I want to share with people.

Just like nobody else can write the stories I have to tell, no one else sees this writing journey in exactly the same way I do. I don't have to be any more insightful or meaningful or anything else than I already am. I just need to be more me. And really, that's good enough.

So friends, what makes you you? Do you ever feel that pressure to be more? What do you do about it?


Sarah said...

I often do think about the sustainability of my blog and worry I'll run out of things to say, but every week, miraculously, I find I have more than enough. Blogging is a challenge, but I think your approach--of just being you and not trying to be something else--is best.

Laurel Garver said...

Blogging over the long haul does come with certain pressures. I struggle sometimes with the tone issue--that sometimes I just want to post fun, silly things and not have to talk writing craft all the time.

I so agree with this: "I don't have to be any more insightful or meaningful or anything else than I already am. I just need to be more me. And really, that's good enough." Amen!

Kathi Oram Peterson said...

More me. That's great. Go for it.

Krista V. said...

I hear you, Kayeleen. I always want to be "helpful," or "interesting," or "funny" (whatever those labels mean), and sometimes I don't post things because I'm afraid of boring people. I think you've got the right idea, though. We can only be ourselves; people can read or not read accordingly.

I'm about a third of the way through the pages you sent me, by the way;)

ali said...

This is a fantastic post! And yes, I remember feeling that same way once my blog began to be more widely read. Plus, I think you HAVE to be authentic if you're going to blog regularly. Otherwise you would be hard-pressed to maintain the false persona day in and day out. I think blog readers appreciate candor and authenticity more than anything else!

Sierra Gardner said...

I tend to be really hard on myself and always finding things to do better. I just have to stop and pause to figure out whether it is actually something I should work on or whether I'm being too self critical. Sometimes that's harder to figure out than you'd think!

Deana said...

I think most bloggers have to feel this way at one time or another. But you sound like a pretty awesome spontanious (sp?) person from this post alone. I'd say you being you is wonderful. I also think variety is the spice of life. If you tried to be something your not you might begin to fit in the mold of people trying to hard and who wants a mold? I love all different kinds of blogs and your honesty has added you as another I like:)

Deana said...

What a sincere letter! So there really are other people who feel this way? It is great to know we are in this together.

I love that no matter what, you are keepin' on keepin' on!